Fate is a cruel mistress, thats all I can say. I was praying hard my gut feeling was wrong. But in the end, the sms from SG proves that my gut feeling was right all along...Somehow i felt relief after knowing this as I can finally stop worrying and thinking too much. I don blame him or anyone.. The only one to blame is myself and my life... So now it's back to one square to re-find members...
I am losing faith, I really dunno why Lord had made an arrangement like this for me by giving me some hope and cruelty snatch it away from me again and again...Had all my prayers for the past few weeks been in vain? I really abit lost on how to continue from here...My life had been been facing with struggles and more struggles eversince 2007in engineering. And Lord, I am really thankful for what you had done for me and leading me through each and everyone of it. But I would like to ask, Why are you giving me so much struggles and hardships in the first place? And I am really at witt end for this obstacle. Can I really on rely on you to guide me and solve this obstacle? But then again, you are the only person that I believe is capable of guiding me, and I will still pray sincerely to you and pray that you will guide me along through each and every hardship and be thankful for everything you had granted me so far...
But one thing for sure. I WILL NOT GIVE UP. I had came so far, through lots and lots of struggles to switch course. If I give up at this point of time, I will be wasting the chance that my family and friends had given me and never forgive myself for being so incapable and useless. I should also learn to keep misery in my heart rather den showing it on my face and sharing to keep less people to worry....Because the role of a cheeky person is to keep people around him happy. So The world will go very wrong, if people starts to worry for the most cheeky and cheerful person around them....
SO, even if the skies drop down, somehow i will use it as a blanket to sleep! :)
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